I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.
If everyone demanded peace instead of another television set, then there’d be peace.
The ideas of debtor and creditor as to what constitutes a good time never coincide.
A good film is when the price of the dinner, the theatre admission and the babysitter were worth it.
There are two educations. One should teach us how to make a living and the other how to live.
When I sell liquor, it’s called bootlegging; when my patrons serve it on Lake Shore Drive, it’s called hospitality.
Why waste money on psychotherapy when you can listen to the B Minor Mass?
News is what somebody somewhere wants to suppress. All the rest is advertising.
The best things in life are free. The second-best are very expensive.
You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
I have never had an impulse to go to the altar. I am a difficult person to lead.
One never notices what has been done; one can only see what remains to be done.
Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.
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(This story appears in the 29 May, 2015 issue of Forbes India. To visit our Archives, click here.)